The Student News Site of Marlborough School

The UltraViolet

Marlborough School Student Newspaper
The Student News Site of Marlborough School

The UltraViolet

The Student News Site of Marlborough School

The UltraViolet

Lizze Small Contributing Illustrator
How to help our Earth
April 12, 2024

Wishing You a Merry AP Season!

Double-shot coffee roasting on an open fire, the sweet aroma of freshly-sharpened No. 2 pencils, and a Princeton Review book festively decorated with a rainbow of highlighter colors– ‘tis the Season for AP exams!

During this most wonderful time of the year, celebrated by thousands of students nationwide, many of us enjoy caroling the familiar sounds of “OHMYGOSH YOU GUYS, I’M GONNA FAIL” that echo not-so-merrily across these ever-graceful halls of learning. Obviously, some people seem to have forgotten the true test-taking spirit and instead convince themselves that these two glorious weeks of testing will be more stressful than rewarding.

This sort of gloomy attitude is evident in “30 Things To Do In An Exam When You Know You’re Going To Fail It Anyways!”, a Facebook group with nearly half a million members who seem to have lost touch with the meaning of the AP exam season. Instead of buying into this negativity, let’s remember that our Marlborough education has allowed us to be highly capable and intelligent young women.

Here are some highlights from the “30 Things,” which we should see as a humorous example of this pessimistic mindset. You will NOT “fail,” (check out the College Board’s helpful AP exam tips here) but you should take a break from your studying to read the following ridiculous and inappropriate alternatives to being focused and motivated while taking your next exam:

4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he’s not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling “I’m here, the phantom of the opera” until they drag you away.

19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.

From all of us here at the UV to you, here’s to a successful and (relatively) stress-free exam season!

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